How To Make a Side Chick

I saw her when she walked in and I knew I had to have her.  She was pretty, a little thick, and a lot of attitude.  I like attitude, makes it more challenging.  When I introduce myself, she looks down at my hand and notices the wedding ring right away.  Her smile slowly melds into a “Nigga please” look.  She’s preparing for me to hit on her, I don’t.  I tell her that if she needs any help to let me know, I walk away. 

The next few weeks I don’t pay her any attention.  She’s a good looking woman and she’s used to men hitting on her.  It works her nerve that I barely speak.  She’s vain. 

Eventually I start to hold small polite conversations with her.  

"Kids?"  I ask.  

"One, a daughter." she replies..  

"The father?"

"Locked up," she says.  

I talk about my kids, my nieces and nephews, and my dogs.  We exchange funny stories about our kids like baseball cards.  As the days progress she starts to open up more about her life.  I give her advice.  When she is stressed about something I offer to take her out to lunch.

Eventually I start to “open up” about my relationship with my wife.  She is the mother of my children and I will always love her for that, but I’m not “in love” with her.  We were young when we got married, she was pregnant and I wanted to do right by her.  She doesn’t appreciate me anymore.  We haven’t slept in the same room in five years.  We are talking about getting a divorce.  Some of it is true, most of it is exaggeration, and she swallows all of it.

Then I see it, there in her eyes.  That little twinkle that lets me know that I got her.  It’s the “Too bad he’s married look”.  She has warmed up to me, she is starting to fall for me, even though she knows its wrong.  Before she had her guard up, now it’s down.  Low enough to where I can steal a kiss at work.  She is shocked, maybe even a little angry.  I apologize and walk away.  I avoid her for three days.  All part of the plan.

After three days I approach her and apologize again.  “It’s fine,” she says.  I can tell she enjoyed it.  I can tell she wants me to do it again.  I offer to treat her to lunch to make it up to her, she accepts.  From that point on its stolen moments and secret kisses.  From there it evolves into secret rendezvous and lusty escapades. 

Summer is here, and with the heat comes my promises.  At the beach during those “family moments” I tell her I’m going to leave my wife.  I bring up a wedding, I speak of a new life.  I tell her and her daughter what they want to hear.

But fall is coming.  I have family obligations.

“You knew I was married.”  I tell her.

She cries and curses me.  Do I feel bad?  Not really, I just act like I do.  Besides this will save me from spending the extra cash during the gift giving season. 

Spring comes back around and I go back to the side chick.  She’s mad, I was expecting that.  She’s crying, I expected that.  She tries to hit me, I was expecting that as well.  I hold her as she cries into my chest and I tell her that I love her.  I make promises about leaving my wife. 

Will I?  Why should I?  A man doesn’t make a side salad his main meal.

She loves me, she won’t let me go.  She’s holding onto hope.  She is believing in a fantasy.  She is my faithful side chick, and has been for seven years.